One act of kindness can change the world
“We but mirror the world. All the tendencies present in the outer world are to be found in the world of our body. If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. This is the divine mystery supreme. A wonderful thing it is and the source of our happiness. We need not wait to see what others do.” — Mahatma Gandhi
We all dream of a better world. But, dreaming is not enough. And talking about it is not enough. That is why, you must do what you can, with what you have, wherever you are, to help just a little bit. One small act of ‘good’ can change the world.
How? you may ask, well that’s because that action is certainly going to be noticed by another person, and that person may be inspired to do the same. And when that person does the same action, they will inspire a group of people, and that group of people will inspire another group of people, and the cycle goes on.
Eventually, there will be change.
That’s why, the little things matter most. They lead to bigger things.
Kindness: two POV’s
When it comes to kindness, there are two perspectives to acknowledge.
- The kind ones
- The ones receiving that kindness
And both are equally important.
Why all this matters
The truth is that we are all going through some type of pain. Most of the time, we’re having a bad day. Whether it’s built up stress from work, issues with certain people, a past we can’t get over, or simply pressure to show up, it can impact how we internally feel. At some point, our overall mood can also impact those around us.
Some of us will try and hide our struggles, mask all the pain with a smile. Others will act out, throw their frustrations at others. That is why you can never really understand what people are going through. One single word can trigger something, breaking right through them. One single act of kindness can make their whole day, and help them forget about their worries.
Imagine if every time you decided to be kind to someone, for whatever reason, in whatever way, they felt better. And when they felt better, they were nicer to others, and had that same impact on those around them. It is a never ending cycle, and it can create change.
Can your attitude be excused?
It’s important to understand that we live for each other. Good people are good to others. We are happier, when we make others happy. You cannot be mean to people simply because you are going through problems. It’s not their fault, nor can they magically change your life, and you can’t expect them to ‘understand’.
There is absolutely nothing that justifies your bad attitude and disrespect. We are all going through problems, you are not special. Even if you’re having a bad day, it’s not your job to make their day worse.
Why are people bitter?
I really like the way Jordan Peterson describes the resentful attitude of a bitter intellectual. I feel like it greatly represents the perspective of those people who sit behind a counter and say something really rude, or give us attitude, and then you go on about your whole day thinking about them.
“..he was bitter because he hadn’t educated himself to the level that his intellect would have demanded, so he had to take jobs that were beneath him intellectually. He had that really intellectual arrogance, because he was smart, and really smart people often come to believe that only smart matters and if they’re smart and all that matters is smart, then the world is sort of laying itself at their feet and they’ve been terribly betrayed.
They cling to their intelligence, which is more like a talent or a gift, like it’s a false idol, and get cynical about the stupidity of the world and the fact that their talents weren’t properly recognized, and that’s just not that helpful, because smart is a good thing, but if you don’t use it properly it will devour you.
You might have a talent, it’s your friend if you use it properly, and if you misuse it, it will be your enemy, and maybe that’s how God keeps the cosmic scales adjusted.”
“Imagine you have a job as a check out person in a grocery store, you can be some miserable, resentful, horrid bastard doing that job. You can come in there just exuding resentment, bitterness and making sure that every customer that passes by you have a slightly worse day than they need to. And you’re resentful about the people who gave you the position because they’re above you in the dominance hierarchy.
On the ‘opposite diner’
“you go into the opposite diner, and you order some bacon, eggs and some toast and then you look around in the diner, and you think, it was like 1975 when the windows were last washed, and there’s this kind f thick coating of ‘who gives a damn’ grease on the walls, and the floor too has got some sort of stickiness that you really have to work out to develop over years.
And the waitress is not happy to be there, and the guy behind the counter isn’t happy that that happens to be the waitress that he’s working with.
The eggs are too cooked on the bottom, so they’re kind of brown, and then they’re kind of raw on top and they’re cold in the middle. You really have to work to cook an egg like that, but you can master that with ten years of bitterness. And here’s what you do with the toast, you take the white bread, (you know the pre sliced stuff that no one should ever eat), and then you put that in the toaster, and you overcook it. And then because its overcooked, you scrape it off and you knock off the crumb so it doesn’t look too burnt and then you wait till it’s cold. That’s not breakfast, that’s hell.” — Jordan Peterson in his lecture Biblical series V: Cain and Abel: The hostile brothers at 1:27:38
I always wondered about how I’m supposed to deal with those people, or even react to the situation. Do I say something nice in hopes of inspiring them to be nicer? Or do they not deserve to be said something nice to because of how bitter they are? But come to think about it, they are those who cope with their problems by projecting it on others. They are simply those on the wrong side of their ways with coping.
The only right answer with dealing with their bitterness is to not let it affect us in any way, and to just ignore it. It’s never personal. As much as it hurts, at times, to interact with someone that bitter, it’s not our job to fix them.
Why be kind?
It doesn’t take much effort. It’s really not that hard. In fact, it will make you feel good in return. Even when life is harsh, it’s worth sticking around to maybe making your little corner of the world a slightly better place. Because happiness is amazing. It’s so amazing that it doesn’t matter if it’s yours or not.
Not only that, but you actually meet people when you’re generally kind. Giving a random compliment is a conversation starter. And that eventually leads to making long term friends.
What kindness does to people
I once had a teacher in seventh grade who made me feel so special, and I’ll never forget her for that. For the first time ever, I felt seen. She knew my potential, helped me believe in it, and work towards making something of it. Every week, we had to submit an essay about an expert from a certain book. Some of the essays I wrote were bad, but others were great. She could tell when I worked hard on certain ones and when I didn’t, and she even told me that when I do work hard on the essay, it always turned out beautiful. Apart from her kind spirit, and enthusiasm for the class, she inspired me to work harder. By the end of the year, she said that one day we’ll see my name on books. In some ways, she’s the reason I still write today.
That’s the thing about being kind. It changes people’s lives. There is so much beauty in feeling seen, it gives you hope that there are genuinely good people out there.
As sad as I was in school, tired of being in classes I had no interest in, her kindness and positivity made my days slightly better, and inspired me to have the same impact on others. I wanted to inspire others the way she inspired me. And so I did.
Be the change you want to see in the world.
